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How to Create Healthy Boundaries

10 years ago
Elviera Schreuder
Wellbeing
What are boundaries?
A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. They affect all areas of our lives:
  • Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances.
  • Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions.
  • Emotional boundaries help us deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others.
  • Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God’s will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator.

Signs that you need to set some boundaries:
When you find it difficult to say “no” to others, do things because you feel guilty or obligated, try to please others even at the expense of what’s best for you, or if you don’t express your thoughts and feelings when someone upsets you, you are putting yourself last and putting others first and THAT doesn’t benefit either parties.

How to set boundaries:
Setting boundaries means that you have to take ownership of your life. In essence you need to show up for yourself, love yourself and learn when to say “Yes” and how to say “No”.

Boundaries are about allowing good things in and keeping bad things out.
Some people have it in reverse where they constantly allow bad things in like hurt, abuse, misuse and keep good things out – like healing.

When you set boundaries, you will deal with angry, upset people and this will most likely make you feel anxious or fearful.

The main thing when setting boundaries is choosing LOVE. Love for yourself and love for others. What I mean by that is when you set clear boundaries, you will experience freedom from feeling abused, used, disrespected, etc. In turn I believe that you love for others will also grow because you will have healthy relationships.

In closing I want to ask you to do two things:
1. Respect other people’s boundaries.
2. Choose three boundaries to implement into your life over the next two weeks. It can be simple things like not chatting on your phone till 2am in the morning, but communicating your need for sleep and informing others that you will not be chatting after 10pm at night anymore.

That’s it!

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Be like Luna, when she sees a puddle (opportunity) Be like Luna, when she sees a puddle (opportunity), she goes for it!
𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗹 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗴𝘁𝗵𝘀 — 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗯𝗼𝗹𝗱𝗹𝘆.

Every vision starts with clarity, and every next step gets easier when you know what you’re naturally best at.
That’s why I coach individuals and businesses to uncover, understand, and live their strengths.

If you’re ready to move from where you are to where you dream to be — let’s connect.
Your future is calling… what will your answer be?
𝗙𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗽 𝗦 𝗙𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗽 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 🚀

Entrepreneurship has always been one of my favourite things — not just building businesses, but growing the people behind them.

Last night I attended “𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗦𝗔’𝘀 𝗠𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗦𝘂𝗰𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗽𝘀” in Stellenbosch, hosted by @theopenletterza at @theworkshack . The main speaker, Malan Joubert, shared how FireID has been part of creating some incredible companies — @snapscanapp, @luno_global, @offerzen and more. His journey was filled with both remarkable successes and valuable failures.

One of my key takeaways?
💡 𝗠𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝗲𝘃𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗮.
Whether it’s location, market needs, technology adoption, timing, luck, or connections — the journey rarely looks like the plan.

After the talk, we had the chance to “Choose Your Journey.” I chose to play the FinMaster financial education game (and had so much fun while learning!). It was great to also connect again with Elijah Djan one of the creators of @play_finmaster.

Afterwards, we enjoyed snacks, drinks, and live music — a perfect blend of learning, connection, and inspiration.

As a @cliftonstrengths 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵 who also works with entrepreneurs through 𝗚𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘂𝗽’𝘀 𝗕𝗣𝟭𝟬, I love seeing how adaptability, problem-solving, and the right partnerships can change the trajectory of a business. These are exactly the kinds of strengths I help teams uncover and harness.

Here’s to building, evolving, and growing — both businesses and the people who run them.

#Entrepreneurship #GallupBP10 #CliftonStrengths #BusinessGrowth #StartupLife #Networking #FinancialEducation #Adaptability #SouthAfrica
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